LFB – Defining the Pegada

The above was taken from the, um, always trustworthy Yahoo Answers and it depicts what it means to have the illustrious and time-honored “pegada” (from pegar, lit. to grab), which is the Holy Grail of male-to-female attraction in Brazil. I translated the gist of it below and added some other (Yahoo) answers…Afterwards, see the comment(s).

– “To have pegada is to take charge, to be confident when you approach a woman. If you want to kiss her, you go and do it.

For example, imagine there’s a guy who approaches a woman, he talks then talks some more and nothing happens. They’ve met and stay a long time talking and after an hour goes by that’s when he tries to touch or kiss her only to find out that she’s lost interest. This is what it means to not have pegada, to not take charge and show confidence. This is a lack of masculinity.

If the guy doesn’t have pegada, rarely will the woman feel attraction towards him, it doesn’t matter how good he looks or how much money he has. If the guy has pegada, he’ll have an advantage over any other guy that doesn’t have it and yet is fighting over the same woman.”

– “It is said to be an exceptional quality that a man possesses when kissing or having sex with someone.”

– “Pegada is nothing more than, among women, that typical butterflies in the stomach feeling that they feel upon being touched. In other words, it’s a slight sexual excitement felt via touch.”

– “basically he ‘grabs’ me today and for the rest of the week, when I remember that day, I still get aroused….that’s when you know he’s got pegada!”

And finally, a 15 year old’s answer…

– “yo, it’s like this, you walk up to the girl, grab her by the waist, say a quick “hi” and give her a 5-minute kiss (cause if 3 seconds have gone by and she hasn’t slapped you yet, you know she’s likin’ it). But, on the real, if she says you ain’t got pegada, make sure she’s not a dude.”

6 thoughts on “LFB – Defining the Pegada

  1. And this is how rape culture lives on.

    Grabbing and kissing someone without their consent é assédio sexual.

    Eu gosto muito mais de quando definem pegada como assertividade, beijar bem, dar tesão na outra pessoa.

    Infelizmente nossa sociedade é muito machista ainda, e isso é evidenciado por essas respostas em que masculinidade é definida com a capacidade de assediar mulheres sexualmente e considerar que o corpo delas está disponível para seu uso sempre que quiser.

    Just because some assholes said that’s how it works, doesn’t make it okay. Please don’t grab or kiss anyone without their consent. Anywhere. Ever.

    • I agree with you.

      These definitions are obviously geared towards people one may not know (someone in a bar or party, etc) though what got me to write this post was a discussion with some Brazilian women about what a man needs to do if he wants to conquistar (even the verb depicts domination) a woman that has already expressed interest (ie, if they’ve been dating or are starting a serious relationship).

  2. Reblogged this on Cupid's Shield and commented:
    This isn’t exactly related to advice here in the United States but it’s interesting to see how dating works around the world. This post is from a blog on Brazil and is an illustration of how male confidence and dominance is important to attracting a female.

  3. Seriously, where did you find this crap and where did you live???
    What kind of people did you relate to???
    Never, ever do that!
    Normal, decent women will slap you and call the police!
    A guy like that is not attractive, he is just an asshole!

    I am tired of this shitty image of my country and women!
    The country has many issues (as any other country) but this kind of bad publicity does not help… anybody.

    • Como mencionei no meu outro comentário, eu concordo com você. Ao mesmo tempo, não se pode negar que isso existe e acontece no país inteiro (pelo menos, entre jovens e pessoas até uns 30-35 anos, e olha, já morei no norte, nordeste e sudeste). Não é todo mundo, claro, mas é algo conhecido culturamente. Eu diria que a pegada (no mundo inteiro, na verdade) é algo positivo, no sentido de ter pegada com quem já está…embora chegar numa mulher e comecar a beijá-la, de repente assim, não concordo nem um pouco com isso e eu nunca faria.

  4. Pingback: The IPEA Study & Sexualized Spaces | Eyes On Recife

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